Love Fraud: how to spot it, what to collect, and how/when to report

Naomi K.
Sep 19
6 min read

Romance scams (sometimes called “love fraud”) are emotionally devastating and often financially ruinous. Scammers build trust or claim a relationship, then ask for money, gifts, or help moving funds — sometimes involving fake emergencies, fake investment opportunities, or requests to use your bank account. Below is a plain-English guide to help you recognize the signs, collect the right proof, and get your report to the right agencies quickly.

Quick action — where to report right now

If you’re in immediate danger, call 911.
If the scam happened online (dating app, social media, email, text), file a complaint with the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) at https://www.ic3.gov. The IC3 is the FBI’s primary intake for internet-enabled frauds (including romance scams). Internet Crime Complaint Center
To submit a tip to the FBI (non-IC3 matters or threats), you can use the FBI’s online tip form at https://tips.fbi.gov or call the FBI at 1-800-CALL-FBI (1-800-225-5324). (The FBI encourages victims of online fraud to use IC3; for field office contact or federal tips use the main FBI contact channels.) Federal Bureau of Investigation+1

Note: The FBI does not maintain a public “tips@fbi.gov” mailbox for general complaints — use the tips form or call. For internet fraud specifically, IC3 is the correct online intake. Federal Bureau of Investigation+1

Does crossing state lines involve the FBI?

Yes — when criminal activity crosses state lines or affects people in multiple states, it often becomes federal jurisdiction and federal agencies (including the FBI and the U.S. Attorney’s Office) may get involved. That’s one reason romance/online scams that move money across states or countries often get routed to IC3/FBI. However, local police and state prosecutors may still handle many cases; federal involvement depends on the facts (interstate activity, scale, organized crime, victims across states, etc.). Eisner Gorin LLP+1

How quickly should you report?

Report as soon as possible. Rapid reporting helps in several ways: investigators can preserve logs, financial institutions may freeze or reverse transfers quicker, and patterns can be identified across multiple victims. Even if you think the loss is small or you’re unsure, file with IC3 and local police — IC3 asks you to file even if you’re unsure whether it “qualifies.” Internet Crime Complaint Center+1

What evidence to collect and keep (do this first)

IC3 advises you to retain all evidence — they don’t accept attachments with your complaint, but investigators will ask for originals if an investigation opens. Keep everything in a secure place and make backups. Internet Crime Complaint Center

Start by collecting and preserving:

Full message history (texts, DMs, emails) — keep timestamps and headers for emails if possible.
Screenshots of profiles (dating site profile, social media, photos) and any profile URLs.
Email headers or full emails (showing sender, date/time, routing info).
Phone numbers, call logs, and voicemail recordings.
Transaction records: bank statements, wire transfer receipts, money-transfer confirmation (Western Union, MoneyGram, Zelle, Venmo, etc.), cryptocurrency wallet addresses & transaction IDs.
Receipts for items sent (shipping tracking numbers) or for payments.
Any “official” documents the scammer sent (fake IDs, fake court documents, invoices).
Photos, videos, and any voice messages.
Names, addresses, and usernames the scammer used (and any names of people they claimed to be).
Screenshots or copies of online ads, websites, or recruitment/“opportunity” pages connected to the scammer.
Notes of dates and short summary of each contact (what they asked for, how they reacted if you pressed them).

Practical tip: Make two copies — one digital (encrypted) and one physical (printed). Keep originals secure; investigators may request originals later. Internet Crime Complaint Center

Red flags / warning signs of love fraud

Very fast escalation of “feelings” and pressure to move off the dating site to direct messaging. Federal Bureau of Investigation
Excuses for never meeting in person (work overseas, medical emergency, sudden deployment) — then requests for money to “get home,” pay medical or legal fees, or pay a “customs/tax” charge. Federal Bureau of Investigation
Requests to wire money, use gift cards, send cryptocurrency, or to use your bank account to receive funds. Federal Bureau of Investigation
Inconsistencies in stories, odd timing, or details that don’t check out (photos that reverse-image search to different names). Federal Bureau of Investigation
The “too perfect” profile that refuses to video-chat, or claims private/secret reasons to avoid calls. Federal Bureau of Investigation
The person tries to isolate you emotionally (discourages you from talking to family/friends) or pressures you to keep the relationship secret. Federal Bureau of Investigation
They ask you to accept payments, move money, or act as a “courier” — classic money-laundering red flag. Internet Crime Complaint Center

Step-by-step: what to do now (if you think you’re a victim)

Stop contact with the suspect immediately. Do not send more money or follow additional instructions. Federal Bureau of Investigation
Contact your bank or payment provider right away. Ask them to freeze accounts, recall transfers, or flag suspicious transactions. Acting fast can sometimes recover funds. Digital Forensics
File an IC3 complaint at https://www.ic3.gov (online form) for internet-based romance scams. Provide as much detail as possible in the form; keep the original evidence backed up for investigators. Internet Crime Complaint Center+1
Submit an FBI tip for any threats, suspected organized-crime links, or interstate elements at https://tips.fbi.gov or call 1-800-CALL-FBI (1-800-225-5324). Federal Bureau of Investigation+1
File a complaint with the FTC (reportfraud.ftc.gov) — the FTC aggregates consumer complaints about scams and can help with patterns and consumer guidance. (FTC reports do not replace law enforcement complaints.) Federal Communications Commission
Consider filing a local police report — some financial institutions require a police report before refunding; local law enforcement can also start an investigation or preserve evidence.
If you’ve shared identity documents, consider a fraud alert or credit freeze with the major credit bureaus.
Keep a chronological log of everything you file (date, agency, complaint number, contact person).

What to include in your report (IC3 / FBI / local police)

When you file with IC3, the FBI, or police, include:

Your contact info and the best way to reach you.
Dates and times of first contact and most recent contact.
Exact amounts, dates, and methods of payment (wire, bank transfer, gift cards, crypto).
Full text copies of messages or a clear summary (you can paste critical text into the IC3 form).
Names, usernames, phone numbers, email addresses, profile URLs, and any IP addresses (if available).
Bank account numbers or transaction references that show money movement.
Any supporting documents you saved (but retain originals — IC3 does not accept attachments but may request originals later). Internet Crime Complaint Center

Recovering funds — what are the chances?

Recovery depends on how you paid and how quickly you act. Wire transfers and cryptocurrency are hard to recover once completed; credit card or bank ACH transactions may have a better chance if the bank responds quickly. The sooner you report to your bank and to IC3, the better the chance of mitigation. Digital Forensics+1

Example resources & official links (save these)

FBI — main contact and tips: https://tips.fbi.gov. Call: 1-800-CALL-FBI (1-800-225-5324). Federal Bureau of Investigation+1
IC3 (Internet Crime Complaint Center) — file internet-fraud/romance scam complaints: https://www.ic3.gov (or https://complaint.ic3.gov). Internet Crime Complaint Center+1
FTC — report consumer fraud & get recovery resources: https://reportfraud.ftc.gov. Federal Communications Commission
USA.gov guide to reporting crime and connecting with local law enforcement: https://www.usa.gov/report-crime. USAGov

Final notes — safety and emotional support

Love fraud is not your fault. Scammers are skilled manipulators. In addition to reporting the crime, consider reaching out to a trusted friend, a counselor, or a victim-assistance hotline. If the scam involved elder abuse or exploitation of a vulnerable adult, contact adult protective services in your area and your local police immediately.

Falling victim to love fraud can feel overwhelming, but you are not alone — and you do have options. Acting quickly, preserving proof, and reporting to the proper agencies can help stop the scammer and protect others.

If you’ve suffered financial loss, one potential avenue is pursuing recovery through Small Claims Court. At Elite Document Solutions, we assist with preparing and organizing the necessary paperwork so you can present your case clearly and effectively. While we cannot guarantee recovery of funds, having the right documents in order increases your chances of holding scammers accountable.

Taking action not only helps you move forward but also sends a powerful message that fraud will not go unchecked.